Trust No One!

About a month ago my asst. principal calls me during the middle of class and says “find a sub for February 24th, I am sending you to a training. I’ll explain more later.” So I said ok, hung up, and got back to teaching. I then started searching high and low for a sub, but all my usuals were already committed, so I thought it must be a pretty popular training. I finally found someone AWESOME (shout-out SS) got her put into the system, and forgot about it. Until last weekend when I realized the training was coming up and I had no idea what it was about, what time it stated, what building it was in. I knew nothing other than it was on the 24th. So on Monday morning I sent an email to my AP asking for more specifics, and I never heard back from her. Not even so much as a, I’ll get back to you later. Just radio silence.
That annoyed me to no end. I came home about mid-week complaining to Dave that I was still clueless about my training on Friday. I told him that I knew she had seen my email because any message sent within GISD shows a timestamp of when it was opened. I also looked on Oracle and couldn’t find any trainings listed for the 24th and so I was starting to worry that I had misheard and really it was the 23rd because there were lots of classes listed for that day. Dave just kept defending her and defending her and finally said that maybe I would just end up with a free day off.
Thursday morning on my drive into work my mom tells me she knows what my training is because she was sending several of her teachers to it as well. I took that time to whine a little more about my APs sealed lips and how frustrated it was making me. I got to work that morning and sent yet another email asking for some details. Finally, near the end of the day I heard back from her and all it said was 8:30 at the PDC; still no idea what I was learning about. Oh well, I just decided to go with the flow. I got my sub plans all ready to go, threw the spiral I take with my to all staff developments into my car so I could take some good notes like I was told to do, and was just excited about the prospect of getting to sleep a few extra minutes later than normal.
That night at dinner Dave and I were talking about the twins and about how life was about to change and this is pretty much the transcript of the conversation we had:
D: I think we need to get away one last time before the boys get here.
J: Ok. We can go camping! (side note- we are going camping over spring break.)
D: What about a weekend in Fredericksburg?
J: (paying more attention to the Nacho and her cuteness than our conversation) Ok.
D: We could stay in a B&B.
J: Sure. I’ve always wanted to go there.
D: Ok good. We are going this weekend.
J: huh?
D: Your mom is taking the Nacho for the weekend.
J: huh?
D: You don’t actually have a training tomorrow.
J: huh?
D: We are leaving in the morning after my conference call. Driving down, staying at the Magnolia House, and having an awesome weekend.
J: huh?

Slowly, the pieces started to all fit together. I think I was so confused and then stunned that I don’t think I ever properly responded with excitement to him, but trust me, I was excited! It took me a while to finally figure out that everyone was in on it and I was the only clueless one. I think I had to ask a few times “are you sure there is not training tomorrow???”
Yep, my mom and my AP were in on it the whole time. I am surrounded my sneaks! And I am so glad I am. It was a wonderful surprise and it has been a wonderfully awesome and relaxing weekend. I’m sure it is the last of its kind for a long, long time. Granted the weekends we are going to have from this point forward are going to be awesome for a whole slew of different reasons (well, for 3 pretty awesome reasons!) Its been nice to have one last grown up getaway.

Name Explaination

So some people are quite upset that we are keeping the names a secret. I mean there are people that have gotten mad and yelled at me in emails about it, it's pretty ridiculous. My favorite was from a woman that was a complete stranger (we were only friends in order to be FV neighbors) who called me stupid and selfish. Yeah, she's not on my friend list anymore. So I just want to take a second and explain why we are not sharing the names until the babies are born in hopes that people might be a little more tolerant if they understand where I am coming from.

But before I begin, I need to say that I am 1000% grateful for all the love and support and prayers we have gotten from everyone throughout this process. We would not be where we are (and still be sane) if it wasn't for everyones support. I have been hesitant to explain myself earlier because I didn't want people to think I was being ungrateful, because that couldn't be further from the truth.

When we found out we were pregnant with the Nacho, it was almost exactly 2 months until our wedding. We didn't tell anyone, I mean anyone, not even my mom. It was our little secret until the day we got home from the honeymoon. It was kind of fun to have that little thing between us, something that was just ours, for a little while. And then after we told, I still had those times with the Nacho that it was just she and I. Lying in bed at night feeling her move, or in the shower looking at my growing belly - I loved those moments when it was just she and I. I knew that soon enough I would be sharing her with the rest of the world. Plus, with the Nacho we didn't find out the gender, so we got to have a little surprise in the delivery room. (oh who am I kidding, we got more than a little surprise in the delivery room. We got "It's a girl!" followed by "It's a hysterectomy!" Good times, good times.)

This time around I don't have any of that. I haven't had a single private moment. Everyone has known what was going on from the second we started looking for a surrogate. And again, I have been so thankful for that, I needed that support, and I still do. But I also wanted something that was just ours for at least a little while. I don't get to have any quiet alone moments with the boys. I didn't get to have any moments with my husband where we just gave each other that look that said we were both in on something. We won't get a surprise in the delivery room of finding out if they are boys or girls. So if wanting to keep the names to ourselves makes me selfish, if that makes me sound ungrateful, then so be it.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Mommy's Tummy

We have been talking to the Nacho about her baby brothers and how they are in Ms L's tummy. So she will often tell us that she has baby brothers and that they are in Ms. L's tummy, but I don't think she really understand much beyond that. Well tonight at dinner when a Jimmy Buffett song came on she said "I like this music!" I told her she went to her very first JB concert when she was in my tummy. And she said that her baby brothers were now in mommy's tummy. I reminded her that no, mommy's tummy was broken, so her brothers were in Ms. L's tummy. There was a little more conversation about mommy's broken tummy, and she kept lifting my shirt to look at it before she asked me if I wanted a hug. Of course I said YES! So she climbed in my lap and gave me a big bear hug and several kisses, which of course put a giant smile on my face. I told her that she made mommy so very happy. The Nacho then looked me in the eye and asked, "Is your tummy all better now?"


No baby, its not, but my heart sure is!!!!!


And, because she is so flipping cute, here is a little video of the Nacho explaining about humpty dumpty.

She popped!

I saw L 2 Friday's ago at our last peri appointment and she was looking pregnant but not hugely so. Then this past Friday we met for dinner and holy smokes, she has popped majorly!! It is crazy how much she has changed in 7 short days. I just kept staring at her in disbelief. I kept having to tell myself those were MY babies in there. MY BABIES!!!! Unreal! L is going to let me take a picture when I see her this Friday at our appt, that way I can stare at that beautiful belly whenever I want.

Some People

Ohmygosh! I can't believe I forgot to tell you this story!

It was at our appointment a few days before Christmas. We were sitting in the waiting room at Dr. R's office waiting to be called back for our appointment. There was another woman, who we shall call Mrs. Crazy, waiting on her sister who was back for her appointment. Somehow we ended up in a conversation that started being about getting induced. Mrs. Crazy's sister was apparently being pressured to be induced since it was close to the holidays. At first we went along with the conversation, commenting about yeah, some doctors try to do that for their convenience or for the patient's convenience. This went on for a few minutes and then Mrs. Crazy started in on how L could deliver these babies naturally, she didn't need an epidural. She's a woman, her body was built to do this. Mrs. Crazy had had 800 natural deliveries, most of which were at home. Well, maybe not 800, but I don't remember the exact number. She then told L that the doctors were going to try and scare her and get her to have all kind of medical interventions that she didn't need because again, she is a oman her was built for this. She just kept going on and on and on and on. I don't think she got the clue to shut up when we kind of started ignoring her and not responding other than a meek nod of the head. What I really wanted to say, and now wish I HAD said was something along the lines of, "We don't need the doctors to scare us, we know full and well about all the things that can go wrong. I know she could bleed out and need a hysterectomy, because it happened to me. I know the babies could have complications that result in us planning a funeral during their first few days of life because it happened to my nephew. I know all about it, don't need any doctor to scare me. Had either my sister or I delivered at home we would be dead, so there is no way in HELL L is going to have MY babies at home. Plus, if she wants to have an epidural or any other kind of help while she tries to deliver these babies, the babies she is selflessly carrying for us, then she can have all the drugs she wants. So more power to you and your med free, doctor free, easy births. But maybe you should keep your opinions to yourself because you don't know everyone's story. Not everyone is as lucky as you."


But instead I just sat there listening to her drone on and on, and just prayed we would be called back soon. But even as we were walking through the door for our appointment she calls out to L, you can do it, you were made for this.

Names

Yes, we have names picked out.


No, we are not telling.


















Nope, not even you.


















No, not you either, your embroidery/custom whatever can wait.




No point in trying to pester me about it, unless your goal is to piss me off.

December 8th Appointment

Yes, yes, yes, I know I am behind and need to get you caught up. So sorry, life is busy. I'll try to get updates from the previous 2 appointments done today, starting with the appointment we had at 17 weeks 2 days.

For the basics, both babies looked good, and both babies were still boys. Everything with L is also looking good. Her BP is good, she feels good, everything is great. Both babies were measuring 17 weeks 4 days and were weight 8 oz each. We've got one whole pound of baby now!! Baby A had a heart rate of 153 and Baby B's was 136, which is pretty close to their HR at the last appointment.


The ultrasonographer looked at all the important parts and everything looks good on both babies. The both had beautiful hearts with 4 chambers, their brains looked good, no sign of a cleft lip or palate, femur measuring good, could see the stomachs, kidneys, and bladders. I then heard the u/s tech say she was looking at the cord insertions. I asked her if they were inserted into the correct place on the placentas. She said that wasn't what she was looking at, she was checking where they cords inserted into the babies. (and it looked good. No sign of an omphalocele.)

So when Dr. G came in, she confirmed everything the u/s tech already told us; that everything looked great. I then asked her about the cord insertion and if they could tell where they were inserted into the placenta.  After we discussed why I had a concern, she pulled out the ultrasound machine again, and explained everything to me and made sure I understood and felt comfortable with our babies cords. But as she is doing it, as she is using the same machine we had used at every appointment, as she just flipped a switch and turned on the color, I had to fight to not lose it. It was that simple, just the flip of a switch. That's all it took to check their cords. That's all if would have taken for Reid, the flip of a switch. I even said that exact thing to Dr. G, and her response was the same response we have heard from every other doctor we have talked to. The doctor we are seeing right now is a perinatologist, the high risk doctor. They have, as Dr. G called them, the Cadillac of ultrasound machines. Most regular OBs do not have a machine that fancy; meaning most don't have the switch to flip, don't have the color doppler. And most women only go see the perinatologist once during their pregnancy, for the NT scan, and then its too early to detect a velamentous cord. Basically, it all boils down to money. The chance of woman having a VC is low, the fancy machines cost too much, a regular OB isn't going to spend that kind of money to try and diagnose something that occurs in 1.1% of pregnancies. But what about the .9%, what about those babies? Do we just write them off? Do we just say, oh well, your not worth the money? It just makes me angry. To see how easily Reid's dramatic birth could have been prevented. All they had to do was flip a freaking switch!

Dr. G did tell me it was ok to cross velamentous cords and vasa previa off my list of worries. And I told her I would do so happily!