Since there will be quite a few different people involved in getting me another baby, I figured I should write out a list of characters to help keep it all straight. These are people I will probably mention with some frequency on here. Anyone else I will explain who they are when necessary. If I find myself talking about someone often, I will add them to the list.
Lead Characters:
Dave/David/daddy/DH: my kind, supportive, and loving husband
The Nacho/Macaroon/DD: my fabulous daughter
Gayla: the independent surrogacy consultant - she is helping us through this whole process, starting with finding a surrogate
L/Surro3: the current surrogate
Dr. Chantilis: the RE that will get my surrogate pregnant
Supporting Cast:
Grammy: my mom
Papa: my dad
Mimi: Dave's mom
Jen: my sister and first option for a surrogate until her son's disastrous birth
Reid-o: my miracle nephew and JA's son
Surro1: dear, dear, wonderful, amazing friend that offered to be a surrogate, but then decided (understandably) the health risks for her were too high
Surro2: found her via an ad. Things were moving right along, and we were aiming for a fall transfer, when she had to make a temporary move to WI to care for an ailing family member.
Justin: my younger brother that passed away in 1997. He is the Nacho and Reid-o's guardian angel. I know neither Reid-o nor myself would be here today if Justin had not been looking out for us on those fateful days.
JJ: my older brother
Ali: JJ's wife
Baby O/OJ: my nephew; JJ and Ali's son
Friday, June 17, 2011
Monday, March 14, 2011
Officially Crazy
I sent an email to my coworkers a few days ago asking them if they knew of anyone that would be a good surrogate. I have officially crossed over to the side of crazy!
Thursday, March 3, 2011
The Story So Far
I have had every intention of writing out a very through birth story for the Nacho's birth, but it never happened. So instead, here is a very abbreviated version of everything that has happened. This is what I have written out to use as we begin our search for a surrogate or adoption agency. (Still going back and forth on that right now. Leaning towards surrogacy, but the thought of someone being pregnant for me scares the cr*# out of me.)
My pregnancy with the Nacho was a piece of cake. My OB (Dr. Jordan) even told me I should teach others how to be pregnant because everything went so well. And her delivery was easy too. I got to the hospital at 9 that night after my water broke at dinner. I started pushing at 4:00 and she was born at 4:48 am. The only problem up to that point was my epidural didn't set up on my right side so I could feel everything on that side, so they had to double dose me which made my left side super numb. After the Nacho was born things get a little fuzzy. I remember thinking it was taking a long time to deliver the placenta, and then it really started hurting. At one point I said I was dizzy and didn't feel very good (now I realize that was due to so much blood loss.) My poor mom and Dave were in there watching and hearing them call for blood and for someone from the nursery to come get the Nacho STAT, etc. Dr. Jordan told me we needed to go to the operating room to help get the placenta out and I didn't care at that point and was grateful to be knocked out because it hurt so bad. They rushed me out and just left my mom and Dave standing there in the empty room looking at the bloody floor. We have video of when they went to tell everyone it was a girl (we didn't find out the gender) and they hadn't turned the camera off when mom told everyone that something had gone wrong. It makes me sad to hear how scared they were.
I also remember getting into the OR and them putting my legs up in the stirrups and them immediately putting them back down again. I found out later that was because on the trip from the delivery room to the OR my placenta finally delivered but it was still attached to my uterus. So when it delivered it caused the uterus to turn inside out. I was in surgery for several hours and received 7 units of blood (basically replenished my entire blood supply) before Dr. Jordan decided it was either my uterus or my life. He said that I was losing blood as fast as he was putting it in. I spent the next 24 hours in the ICU and Dr. J didn't expect me to survive the night. He figured my kidneys would shut down first and everything else would follow. But that didn't happen. Other than having no baby oven now, I have no lasting effects from everything that happened.
After everything happened with me and my delivery, my sister said "I will do it!" And she was very adamant about it. She and her husband W had just started trying to get pregnant, so the plan was for her to have a baby, and after that, when she was ready, carry for us. (If you haven't read that blog post, it is here.) He had a Velamentous cord insertion and vasa previa. His cord tore away from the placenta shortly after Jen's water broke and he basically bled out in utero. Thankfully Jen was at the hospital or we would have lost both of them. We are lucky Reid-o is here today and so far showing no permanent damage. The first few days after he was born we were preparing to plan a funeral. So, even though Jen has said she will still carry for us, there is no way I will let her. She has to have her happy ending before she can help me have mine. After everything happened with Reid-o, it really shook my family up. My brother and his wife were due in another month and we were terrified that something else was going to happen, and JJ demanded they test and look for EVERYTHING, even if Ali didn't have any risk factors – thankfully Baby O had a very normal and boring delivery. We have talked with several different doctors, and they have all said the same thing: there is no genetic link between everything that happened; we just have some incredible luck. My question is, why can't we have that kind of luck with the lottery?????
After Reid-o was born a family friend, Surro1, came forward and said she wanted to be our carrier. So in February we made our first appointment with an Dr. Chantilis. Dave and I have both done the FDA testing, and Dave has made his "contribution" but that is as far as we got. In March, after talking with her doctor and Dr. C, Surro1 decided the risk of taking hormones was too great due to a significant family history of female cancer. After that we decided to move forward with fostering, and recently got denied because they only wanted families that either had one stay at home parent or would take a sibling group of 4 or more. And although I would love to foster children one day, that just wasn't the right move for my family at this moment time. So we have now started researching our options, because I am determined to give the Nacho a sibling!
My pregnancy with the Nacho was a piece of cake. My OB (Dr. Jordan) even told me I should teach others how to be pregnant because everything went so well. And her delivery was easy too. I got to the hospital at 9 that night after my water broke at dinner. I started pushing at 4:00 and she was born at 4:48 am. The only problem up to that point was my epidural didn't set up on my right side so I could feel everything on that side, so they had to double dose me which made my left side super numb. After the Nacho was born things get a little fuzzy. I remember thinking it was taking a long time to deliver the placenta, and then it really started hurting. At one point I said I was dizzy and didn't feel very good (now I realize that was due to so much blood loss.) My poor mom and Dave were in there watching and hearing them call for blood and for someone from the nursery to come get the Nacho STAT, etc. Dr. Jordan told me we needed to go to the operating room to help get the placenta out and I didn't care at that point and was grateful to be knocked out because it hurt so bad. They rushed me out and just left my mom and Dave standing there in the empty room looking at the bloody floor. We have video of when they went to tell everyone it was a girl (we didn't find out the gender) and they hadn't turned the camera off when mom told everyone that something had gone wrong. It makes me sad to hear how scared they were.
I also remember getting into the OR and them putting my legs up in the stirrups and them immediately putting them back down again. I found out later that was because on the trip from the delivery room to the OR my placenta finally delivered but it was still attached to my uterus. So when it delivered it caused the uterus to turn inside out. I was in surgery for several hours and received 7 units of blood (basically replenished my entire blood supply) before Dr. Jordan decided it was either my uterus or my life. He said that I was losing blood as fast as he was putting it in. I spent the next 24 hours in the ICU and Dr. J didn't expect me to survive the night. He figured my kidneys would shut down first and everything else would follow. But that didn't happen. Other than having no baby oven now, I have no lasting effects from everything that happened.
After everything happened with me and my delivery, my sister said "I will do it!" And she was very adamant about it. She and her husband W had just started trying to get pregnant, so the plan was for her to have a baby, and after that, when she was ready, carry for us. (If you haven't read that blog post, it is here.) He had a Velamentous cord insertion and vasa previa. His cord tore away from the placenta shortly after Jen's water broke and he basically bled out in utero. Thankfully Jen was at the hospital or we would have lost both of them. We are lucky Reid-o is here today and so far showing no permanent damage. The first few days after he was born we were preparing to plan a funeral. So, even though Jen has said she will still carry for us, there is no way I will let her. She has to have her happy ending before she can help me have mine. After everything happened with Reid-o, it really shook my family up. My brother and his wife were due in another month and we were terrified that something else was going to happen, and JJ demanded they test and look for EVERYTHING, even if Ali didn't have any risk factors – thankfully Baby O had a very normal and boring delivery. We have talked with several different doctors, and they have all said the same thing: there is no genetic link between everything that happened; we just have some incredible luck. My question is, why can't we have that kind of luck with the lottery?????
After Reid-o was born a family friend, Surro1, came forward and said she wanted to be our carrier. So in February we made our first appointment with an Dr. Chantilis. Dave and I have both done the FDA testing, and Dave has made his "contribution" but that is as far as we got. In March, after talking with her doctor and Dr. C, Surro1 decided the risk of taking hormones was too great due to a significant family history of female cancer. After that we decided to move forward with fostering, and recently got denied because they only wanted families that either had one stay at home parent or would take a sibling group of 4 or more. And although I would love to foster children one day, that just wasn't the right move for my family at this moment time. So we have now started researching our options, because I am determined to give the Nacho a sibling!
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Holiday Picture Post
Happy Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year (although I don't have any New Years pictures to post)!
This year we were in Oklahoma for Thanksgiving, and then drove back to Texas that night. I didn't want to miss Black Friday shopping. Yes, we are those crazy people out shopping at 3 am on Black Friday, and I love every second of it. The Nacho got to spend Black Friday lounging around the house with Papa.
For Chirstmas we spent the morning at home, then went to Uncle As house for an early lunch, then out to the woods for dinner. It was busy, but filled with family, so it was perfect!
This year we were in Oklahoma for Thanksgiving, and then drove back to Texas that night. I didn't want to miss Black Friday shopping. Yes, we are those crazy people out shopping at 3 am on Black Friday, and I love every second of it. The Nacho got to spend Black Friday lounging around the house with Papa.
For Chirstmas we spent the morning at home, then went to Uncle As house for an early lunch, then out to the woods for dinner. It was busy, but filled with family, so it was perfect!
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Goodbye Grandmother.
My dad's mom, my grandmother, my last living grandparent, passed away this morning. We knew it was coming, and I have such a weird mix of emotions right now. She has been sick and getting worse with each passing day, so it was time, and it came as a relief. But I am also sad for us, it's always hard to lose a loved one, no matter how expected it is. My dad says she is now at peace and happy because she has been reunited with her husband, her son Mike, and my brother. Farewell Grandmother Nopo. You were loved dearly and will be missed. See you again one day!
This picture is from the Nacho's baptism. Poor baby had an ear infection and was miserable. We went straight from the baptism to the after house clinic. I have a picture of grandmother hold the Nacho somewhere, but I can't find it. It is probably on my other computer. So this will have to do.
Monday, December 6, 2010
Christmas Card Photo Shoot
In order to try and get a few more possible Christmas card pictures, we staged a photo shoot at home tonight with the Christmas tree. It again, just confirms that I am a lousy photographer.
We also took some pictures when we went up to Grandpa Joe and Grandma Ruths yesterday.
We also took some pictures when we went up to Grandpa Joe and Grandma Ruths yesterday.
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Santa Pictures
This year we went to the Bass Pro shop to get Santa pictures take because you get one free one there. And I like free! Plus, the whole store is decorated so festively, so there are lots of places for photo ops. I took lots of pictures in hopes of getting something to use for a Christmas card. But what I have discovered is I am a terrible photographer. I definitely need to take a class or two. Luckily I have a cute kid and we will make something work out of this bunch.
I worried Mackinley would be scared and cry with Santa. At Halloween time she started showing lots of fears about things, and it hasn't gotten any better. She was scared of Halloween decorations, the scarecrow in the yard for fall, the gnome in Grammy's garden, mommy's stuffed Santa by the fireplace, so I figured the real Santa would be just as scary. But instead she did great. We have decided she can tell a difference between a fake statue and something that is alive. Reid-o just slept the whole time.
I worried Mackinley would be scared and cry with Santa. At Halloween time she started showing lots of fears about things, and it hasn't gotten any better. She was scared of Halloween decorations, the scarecrow in the yard for fall, the gnome in Grammy's garden, mommy's stuffed Santa by the fireplace, so I figured the real Santa would be just as scary. But instead she did great. We have decided she can tell a difference between a fake statue and something that is alive. Reid-o just slept the whole time.
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